7 Ways Chronic Pain's Holding You Back-and How to Start Breaking Free Today

Let’s get real for a minute.

You’ve been holding it all together—career, family, errands, the emotional labor of motherhood—and all while battling chronic pain no one can see (or understand). You’re strong, but you’re tired - deep in your bones and in your spirit. 

I see you. And I’ve been you. I lived it - nine years of migraines, exhaustion, fatigue, and back pain that stole my joy. I found a way through, and out of, the pain to the other side using natural, holistic strategies which I then turned into my S.O.O.T.H.E.™ Method, and now I help moms like you take back control. 

Let’s talk about the 7 biggest pain points I see time and again in ambitious moms like you—and how to start S.O.O.T.H.E.™-ing them naturally, right now.

1. Guilt for Prioritizing Yourself

You give to everyone—your kids, your job, your partner—and the moment you take 20 minutes for yourself? That guilt creeps in fast. I get it- I felt that too, sidelined by pain, wondering if I deserved better.

S.O.O.T.H.E.™ Strategy: Empowerment Through Mindfulness
Start small: Take 5 guilt-free minutes to breathe deeply and ask, “What do I need right now?” Then do it—without apology. You’re not selfish—you’re strategic. Your healing starts with permission.

2. Exhaustion from Over-Giving

You’re burned out from doing all the things and being all the things. Chronic pain makes that ten times harder. The pain's draining you, and there's nothing left for your family, or you. I was there - days lost to fatigue, barely surviving. 

S.O.O.T.H.E.™ Strategy: Optimized Sleep Patterns
Tonight, try a “wind-down boundary”: No screens, no noise, no giving 30 minutes before bedtime. Use lavender oil, turn the lights low, and give your nervous system the reset it craves. (Sleep is not a luxury—it’s a weapon in your healing arsenal.)

3. Frustration with Band-Aid Fixes

You're tired of the “try this new gadget” or “just stretch more” advice. The quick fix of pills fade - nothing sticks, and you're fed up. You want real, lasting change. 9 years of flops taught me that frustration as well. 

S.O.O.T.H.E.™ Strategy: Strategic Cognitive Techniques
Write down every symptom, emotion, and belief tied to your pain for one week. Then identify the mental story you’ve been told about your body. That’s where the rewiring begins-because true healing starts from the inside out. 

4. Fear of Missing Your Own Life

You worry the days are passing you by—moments with your kids, vacations cut short, opportunities in your career, dreams on hold—all fogged over by pain and fatigue. You're scared this is it, for the rest of your life.  I felt that ache, missing out on all the things important to me!

S.O.O.T.H.E.™ Strategy: Transformative Fasting Practices
Try a simple 12-hour overnight fast this week (for example, 7 p.m. to 7 a.m.). This gentle reset gives your body space to heal instead of constantly digesting. And it creates room for mental clarity, too—so you can be present. 

The morning after your fast, take one quiet moment and ask yourself: "What's one thing I would want to experience if I were not in pain - and why does that matter to me?"  That vision is your why.  Hold it close.

5. Shame Around Your Limits

You hate saying no. You hate asking for help. And you hate feeling like a burden. You hide- pain's making you feel weak, and it stings.  I hid my shame too, until I realized I wasn't broken forever, just stuck.

S.O.O.T.H.E.™ Strategy: Holistic Faith Integration
Speak truth over shame: "My worth is not tied to what I produce. My limits are holy. My body is not broken—it’s speaking." Try journaling that truth each morning. Faith gives pain a purpose. It also gives you power.

6. Feeling Alone in the Struggle

You feel like no one really gets it. The loneliness, the invisible struggle, the exhaustion behind your smile. You're faking it, and it hurts.  I was there - nine years of pretending - until I couldn't take it any longer and found a way out, and found a system, and support. 

S.O.O.T.H.E.™ Strategy: Open Awareness of Food Sensitivities
Believe it or not, hidden food triggers can contribute to emotional lows. Try removing one known inflammatory food this week (like gluten or dairy) and notice what shifts—not just in pain, but in connection. And while you’re at it? Connect with someone who gets it.  Tell one person today, "I'm struggling with pain". 

7. Mental Fog & Struggling to Stay Organized

Chronic pain makes even simple tasks feel like mountains. You misplace your keys, forget appointments, and feel like your brain is running on dial-up.

S.O.O.T.H.E.™ Strategy: Enhancing Executive Functioning Skills
Choose one system this week to simplify your mental load. Whether it’s a brain dump journal, a digital calendar with reminders, or a weekly meal planning board—external structure = internal relief. Clarity creates momentum.